Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Misery

I received an email today from a friend asking how I'm doing now that the campaign has ended and indicating he misses my daily blog.  Someone misses my writing, I thought.

This afternoon I sent a text to my life-long friend of the same name - Beth, the Psychologist.  Yep, that is her profession.  Thank god it's her and not me.  Me, as a shrink, is too oxymoronic for any of us to bear.  She said, "You are funny, and your messages are a welcome break."

A funny writer.  Maybe.  An introspective pain in the ass.  Probably.  A lot of things...Who knows.

All I know with any certainty right now is that I'm drinking wine - a gift from someone I could go on about but promised not to (plus he has a lot of keys) - and remembering how much I enjoy this outlet, this respite from my funny, oxymoronic life. 

Hello, blog.  Hello, you.  Hello, Magnolia.  (He's touring now and only true fans or really <'ing> smart people will understand.)

Without a lot of editing effort, here's what's on my mind:  Misery.  Yes, you read me right.  The movie.  I am toying with the idea of a Paul Sheldon-like endeavor; writing as a profession.  While I'm not so sure the name of my protagonist will be "Misery Chastain," I am completely confident I could drum up some equally intriguing porn-pole-stripper meets librarian-stuffed-shirt-thick-glasses kind of name for a main character.  And I am equally, if not even more so sure that I could pull from past experiences to make for one heck of a forty-year plot line.

The movie was an instant four stars with me from its inception.  First, who doesn't think Stephen King is genius other than perhaps a few children plowing corn fields?  James Caan was brilliantly cast, and was only outshone by one Kathy Bates.  Dirty birdy she was...

Sure, Annie (I've been called worse) is an utter psychopath, but it's slightly endearing.  I mean, who has the balls to ever admit to being someone's "number one fan?"  I like it.  It's confident, bold, and direct.  She is knowledgeable about Paul's novels and can speak with both passion and intelligence on point.  Again, I like it.

Annie does, however, purport to disliking Paul's excessive swearing in his new novel.  @*#! that.

Favorite quote from the movie, you ask?  Yes, it's too obvious but I will answer you nonetheless as it is a MUST with me to walk away from every movie with a favorite line: 

"I have tried twice to be married and couldn't do it either time.  But, if you want me to take you away, to scare you or involve you or make you cry or grin, yeah.  I can.  I can bring it to you and keep bringing it until you holler uncle.  I am able.  I CAN."

Welp...time for me to make a phone call.  Maybe he will answer with:  "That's very sweet of you."